Mitch McConnell Looks Like a Turkey Face, Pelosi Says

Nancy Pelosi made a damning statement on Wednesday, suggesting that Mitch McConnell looks like a turkey face and that he should “really do something about it.” The House Speaker added that it would be better for everyone if he would keep his face covered when out in public or in front of a TV camera.

When asked if her recommendation had anything to do with COVID-19, she responded: “No, this has nothing to do with the virus. Even if there wasn’t a pandemic infiltrating our country, I think ‘old man McConnell’ needs to keep his face covered at all times.”

Pelosi’s statement came after Sen. McConnell said Pelosi had “birdlike facial features” that especially became prominent when she was angry. “I was watching CSPAN the other week,” McConnell told Fox News’ Tucker Carlson, “and I saw the House Speaker spewing nonsense about our wonderful President, Donald J. Trump. And while I was watching I couldn’t help but think, you know what? She has birdlike facial features.”

Pelosi did not take kindly to McConnell’s remarks, striking back on MSNBC’s The Rachel Maddow Show with some bold statements of her own. Asked what she thought of the Senate Majority Leader’s statement, Pelosi said he should speak for himself. “I may have birdlike facial features,” she acknowledged, “but Mitch looks like a turkey face.”

The exchange has spurred quite the debate in the national media, as commentators on both sides of the aisle squabble about which politician looks like which animal – more specifically which species of bird.

The American people are also weighing in, as Gallup released a new poll revealing some surprising results:

  • 99 percent of Democrats think Mitch McConnell looks like a turkey face.
  • 99 percent of Republicans think Nancy Pelosi has birdlike facial features
  • 99 percent of libertarians think Mitch McConnell looks like a turkey face and Nancy Pelosi has birdlike facial features

Update: This developing story has really got the TrollWire’s creative juice flowing. The Boss encouraged every staff member to choose a celebrity and match them to an animal that each celebrity most resembles. This is what everyone came up with:

  • Kim Kardashian looks like a sneaky raccoon
  • Sarah Jessica-Parker (obviously) looks like a horse
  • Danny Devito looks like a cute, cuddly panda bear
  • Daniel Craig looks like an angry kitty cat
  • Mr. Bean looks like a northern white-faced owl
  • Cher looks like a sea urchin
  • Miley Cyrus (at times) looks like a giraffe
  • George Clinton looks like a spray-painted caterpillar