Tampa Bay Rays Mascot “DJ Kitty” Arrested for Operating Kitty Fighting Ring

Professional sports fans were stunned on Thursday when Tampa Bay Rays mascot “DJ Kitty” was arrested for operating a kitten fighting ring in the basement of his Tampa Bay home. Stanley Ronaldson, a 28-year-old man who collects stamps in his free time, has been playing the role of DJ Kitty for the past four years.

Ronaldson had also been hosting kitten fights in his basement over the past 13 months. According to police reports, gamblers were betting upwards of $20,000 on favorite kitten-fighters like “Kitty Kat” and “Shorthair Sam.”

A whistleblower reported that Ronaldson would host as many as 24 fights in a single evening. “The kittens were all declawed, so they didn’t do a whole lot of damage to each other,” according to the whistleblower’s statement. “Actually, sometimes the ‘fights’ seemed quite playful.”

When asked by the media what provoked him to start the operation, Mr. Ronaldson indicated that his career as the Rays’ mascot played a significant role. “I let the job get to me,” the man expressed, with apparent remorse. “You know, as DJ Kitty… it’s like I became this persona. And it didn’t help that we’ve won the division just twice in the past two decades.”

Former NFL quarterback Michael Vick took to Twitter to defend Ronaldson, emphasizing the fact that every kitten was declawed and well-fed.

Correction: It was mentioned in this article that former NFL quarterback Michael Vick defended Ronaldson on Twitter. He was actually criticizing the mascot for declawing the kittens, which he claims is abusive and unethical.